How to “Memento Mori” Every Day

What "memento mori" means and how to easily incorporate this important Catholic practice

“I believe in the communion of saints.” Every time we say the Apostles Creed, this is part of what we profess to believe. But who are we talking about, exactly?

The communion of saints means our family, the body of Christ. Not just those people we see in our parish on Sunday, but all Christians, including those who have gone before us. The Baltimore Catechism puts it this way: the communion of saints is “the union of the faithful on earth, the blessed in heaven, and the souls in purgatory, with Christ as their head.” Sometimes these different parts of Christ’s mystical body are distinguished as the Church Militant (you and me, still “fighting the good fight” here on earth), the Church Suffering (those whose love is being purified in purgatory), and the Church Triumphant (those fully united with God and one another in heaven). 

Through Christ all believers are in communion with one another, and together we all make up the Church. As a family, we love and support one another. One specific way we do this here on earth is by praying for those who have died, while also living so as to prepare for our own death. This is exactly what the practice of “memento mori” helps us do. 

What is memento mori, and why does it matter?

“Memento mori” is Latin for “Remember death,” or “Remember you will die.” As Christians, this is a solemn reminder that one day we will be judged by God for what we have done in this life and for who we have become.

At the same time, memento mori is also a motivating reminder, because keeping death before our eyes helps us strive to live a full and virtuous life in the time we are given. This means not just doing good but first and foremost receiving in gratitude the good gifts that come from God (Jm 1:17), the one who alone is good (Mk 10:18). It means, like all the saints, looking to Christ and letting his life and goodness become our own.

Finally, memento mori is a joyful reminder that, as St. Paul says, we who have truly died with Christ will also live with him (Rom 6:8). It entails trust in God’s infinite mercy and goodness, and in the promise of the life to come: “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life” (Jn 3:16). As Christians, we know that while death is inevitable, it is not the end!

How to live out the practice of memento mori every day

Practicing memento mori is not something else we have to add to our “to do” list. It’s actually very easy to integrate into our everyday lives, and you may already be doing it!

Here are a few suggestions for ways to “memento mori” every day:

• Pray for those who have died. Many people do so with the “Eternal Rest” prayer, a beautiful, short prayer that can be added to the blessing before meals or prayers before bed, as well as anytime you pass a cemetery or learn of someone’s death. “Eternal rest grant unto them [or, name], O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May their souls, and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.” 
  
  As Catholics we also pray for the dead every Mass during the Eucharistic prayer, right after the consecration. It’s a great opportunity to remember specific people you know who have died and offer prayers for the repose of their souls. “Remember also, Lord, your servants who have gone before us with the sign of faith and rest in the sleep of peace. Grant them, O Lord, we pray, and all who sleep in Christ, a place of refreshment, light, and peace.”

• We can also pray for those who are near death with the St. Michael the Archangel prayer. One of St. Michael’s offices is to defend us against the wickedness and snares of the devil, particularly in our hour of death. “St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou, O prince of the heavenly hosts, by the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.”

• Pray in preparation for our own death. Catholics do this with every Hail Mary, actually, when we ask Our Lady to “pray for us now and at the hour of our death.” We can also turn to Mary’s  husband St. Joseph - tradition holds that he died in the arms of Jesus and Mary, and he is the patron saint of a happy death.
  
  There’s also the “Ultima,” which takes less than a minute to say or sing, and is a beautiful prayer to add to bedtime. It has a long monastic tradition and I first learned of it from the monks at Benedictine College. When we pray the Ultima, we entrust ourselves to Mary, asking for her intercession at the moment of our death. You can view the score and lyrics (English and Latin) here, or listen to the Latin chant here.

• Have a physical, visual “memento mori” reminder in your home. A crucifix, I think, is the best reminder of the fact that we, too, will die, but also that death is not the end, because Christ has conquered death. On the cross we see the truth of what Christ says: only if a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies does it bear much fruit (Jn 12:24). Life comes not only after death but in and through death, our laying down of ourselves in love, entrusting ourselves wholly into the hands of the Father. We have a couple of crucifixes in different parts of our house, where we can see them each day.
  
  Our “Memento Mori” candle is another physical reminder of our death and a call to pray for others, one that incorporates our sense of smell through its somber scents of clay, stone, and stillness.
  
  Also, having pictures of family members, including those of previous generations, is a great reminder to keep our deceased loved ones in our daily prayers. Michael and I have a “family wall,” which is several shelves holding pictures of both sides of the family, all mixed together. It’s been very meaningful to find family pictures going back as far as the 1800s, and hear the stories of their lives. And it reminds us to remember them in our prayers. Perhaps one day, future generations will do that for us, too!

How do you practice memento mori? Please let us know! And let us continue to pray for each other, for those near death, and for those who have already died.